Maya Angelou's Mom and Me and Mom Book Review

            Though this is Angelou’s seventh autobiography but it’s the first time delving into the complex relationship between she and her mother, Vivian Baxter. This book chronicles their 60-year relationship from California to New York City to Europe to Winston-Salem and Baxter’s impact upon Maya as an adult. After divorcing her father sent Maya and her older brother, Bailey, to love with their paternal grandmother in Stamps, Arkansas, for 10 years. Upon returning to California Maya was filled with so much rage that for the first two weeks she didn’t even address Vivian.  The day her grandmother was leaving for Arkansas, she asked Maya how she would address Vivian. Maya replied’ Lady’. The title stuck. Maya wouldn’t call Vivian ‘mother’ until she helped Maya deliver her son, Guy.

            Mom & Me & Mom differs from all of her other autobiographies because of its referential tone.  Having read I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings there’s a difference.  Even having celebrated her 85^th birthday this past April 4^th, Angelou writes as if she, too, is still learning the lessons that Lady dispensed. Mom & Me & Mom showcases Lady’s evolution from reluctant mother, thug and gambler parlor manager to warm, loving, matriarch not just of her family but the entire Stockton, California community.  In the beginning, when Maya was abused by a boyfriend, Lady used her underworld connections to find him.  Later in life when a Stockton city employee arrived on her doorstep telling her about a family forced to sleep in their car, Lady allowed them to shop her garage full of donated clothing and shower in her house.  The city honored her with a commemorative plaque for her charity.

This is what makes Mom & Me & Mom so memorable because it espouses the importance of her parents must change their style once their children reach adulthood. Angelou admits that Lade ways a horrible mother as a child but a magnificent one as a woman. Whether or not your child is a superstar or note, it serves as a map on how to navigate those murky waters. 

Donating Clothes and Considering Other Charity Alternatives

            Yesterday I donated 10 items (3 pairs of shoes and 7 articles of clothing) to Suited for Change.  Combining this with the 30 articles of clothing that I donated to CUSP Georgetown on behalf of DC Goodwill, 21 items (6 pairs of shoes and 15 articles of clothing) during the first Suited for Change and 2 Homecoming dresses to my friend who works at a DC high school, and I’ve donated 63 items; and, I am not done because I think that I have some more to give away to Suited for Change this Wednesday. Giving away all of these size 12 clothes and sizes 11 and 12 shoes will help so many women dress professionally for jobs.   I am thankful to be in a position to help others and given my size, I know that there aren’t many options for women my size. Size 12 is only one size below plus-size which start at size 14.

On the flip side, I question some of my purchases because they are impulses.  Immediately I start reconsidering every single purchase.  I have more selective criteria.  So far it has been working because I have only bought what I have come to the store.  Next time I’ll donate money to Suited for Change.  Heck, I might even donate my time to helping women revise their resumes and critique their interviewing sessions.  I possess the skills to make a difference so I just might look into it.  

Proactivity Blog Entry #8: Being a Blessing

This week while doing my taxes I realize that I will receive the largest refund of my entire working life. This directly derives from my Dress from Success donations. When I was donating my ill-fitting shoes, I wanted them to go to women wearing a size 12AA. It was rough finding shoes for 12 narrow. The organization would give them to poor women wanting to work, earn a livable wage and feed their families. I did not think that putting them on EBay was appropriate because this recession ravaged the poorest people who could not afford decent shoes yet needed them the most to keep their jobs. The District's 12% unemployment rate proved this. Throughout 2009 I donated over thousands of dollars in shoes.

This year I will expand my charitable giving beyond Dress for Success to include Suited for Change, Goodwill and the Salvation Army. I already have my stuff mapped out. This week I will donate two evening dresses to the DC Public Schools' Annual Prom Donation Drop-Off. Originally I think I would only give the black evening gown I would had worn to the Southern Inaugural Ball; but, after learning that I am a size 8 in strapless gowns, I will give my size 10 silver sequined cocktail dress, too. In addition, I will give my White House Black Market dress and three Forever 21 dresses to either the Goodwill or Salvation Army. Finally, within two weeks I will donate some more shoes to Dress for Success.

Giving to others makes me feel better because I am contributing to my community. This is not a single isolated event. For instance, the old National Coalition of 100 Black Women chapter has sent me the DC Public Schools email. Social change is the cornerstone of all of my social memberships. I refuse to join any group that does not serve the community.

You Cannot Give with a Closed Palm

Increasing my philanthropy has been one of my 32nd birthday wishes so receiving the DC Dress for Success annual luncheon invitation has made my day! Attending this event enables me to realize my personal objective. Having donated money and shoes, I am an avid supporter of this organization because it ensures that women can wear professional clothing, get jobs and feed their families. In addition, the ticket price is affordable. Furthermore, since one of my social service organizations holds clothing drives, I will ask if I may attend this program and give a report at the general body meeting. Since I am picking out my annual event table, I might as well infuse something that’s free! More importantly giving to DC for Success is about lifting as I climb.

This has always been core to my being because no one gets here by himself. Also I want to see people do better. Moreover, charitable giving shows my money maturation because one year ago I could find afford this ticket. However, after signing a one-year rental contract which keeps my costs down, my band promotion, and paying off a student loan, I have enough money to give to others, and in a way, myself.